<h4>News Flash: That's a Turn Off!</h4>

Stop dejas-vu-winking, please.


Have you been approached online by a guy more than once without giving him any indication of your interest? I'm not talking pursuing here either. I'm talking, "Oh, I thought he already tried this a few months ago. I thought he got the hint when I didn't respond." This has happened to me more often than I ever would've guessed. Let's analyze this, shall we? I can see three explanations for a deja-vu wink.

1. He keeps seeing your beautiful face and honestly can not remember that he made the attempt to contact you.
2. He's hoping this time around you'll be more inclined to respond. Maybe you were just really busy before.
3. Two months is long enough for him to have totally cleared any recognition of your online personality. He thinks you're a brand new match!

At the very least, he seems desperate. Desperation is one of the mega-ist turn-offs of all! Other negative attributes that come to mind include: air-headed, inexorable, fervid, ineffectual, pathetic, lame... Maybe, just maybe, he's only nervous; he hasn't summoned the courage to send your exquisite self an e-mail. No excuse. Don't double-wink.

Bottom line: If at first your wink doesn't succeed, oh (if you must) try, try again. But make it a message.